<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>𝐀𝐬 𝐖𝐞 𝐒𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐎𝐮𝐫 𝐅𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐬 by aokasei</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27742129">𝐀𝐬 𝐖𝐞 𝐒𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐎𝐮𝐫 𝐅𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐬</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/aokasei/pseuds/aokasei'>aokasei</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>"as insomnia hits..." [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Best Friends, First Love, Haikyuu Angst Week 2020, Insomnia, M/M, Romance</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 19:33:58</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,207</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27742129</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/aokasei/pseuds/aokasei</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>"as insomnia hits, so does reminiscence."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>after a drinking session with his friends, he thought he was able to forget everything until he couldn't.</p>
<p>it was the 3rd of December and all he could think about was the bittersweet farewells and promises he made with his best friend.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>"as insomnia hits..." [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1994989</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>𝐀𝐬 𝐖𝐞 𝐒𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐎𝐮𝐫 𝐅𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐬</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>originally posted in Wattpad: https://my.w.tt/xx6jAEgMVab</p>
<p>book title: "as insomnia hits... | haikyuu!! pairings"</p>
<p>author: AoKasei</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"You are wasted, great king." Oikawa Tooru squinted his eyes as he heard the nickname he had when they were in high school. "Oh shut up Bo-chan. Not with that nickname again." He groaned but laughed with his friends. </p>
<p>"Do you want some water, Tooru-san?" He looked at Akaashi and shook his head with a smile. "Don't worry too much Kei-chan, I can handle myself. I mean, I drink a lot in Argentina!" He said proudly. Akaashi looked at him concerningly but the male nodded nonetheless. </p>
<p>"Besides, I miss this little pudding here! I thought you would never set your foot here in Japan?" He hugged and teased his little friend who scrunched his nose up and shrugged. "Keiji's birthday coming up and I wanted to surprise him after Bokuto persuaded me to go back here," Kenma muttered. </p>
<p>"So you don't really want to see me?" Kuroo whined to which Kenma glared. "Watch your place, Kuro. Don't think we're all good now," Kenma said that made them laugh. "I thought you two got back together already or something?" He asked to which Kenma shook his head. </p>
<p>"Not yet." Kuroo corrected with a genuine smile. "I mean, I'm still courting him so anything is possible," Kuroo added to which Kenma hit his head. "Doesn't mean I'll say yes," Kenma said that made the other three laugh. "Then I won't give up until you say yes, kitten," Kuroo said while Kenma blushed before smacking the black-haired male's head. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Anyway, until when will you two stay here in Japan?" Akaashi asked and looked at him and Kenma. "Until the end of the year, I guess? I'll visit my folks next week in Miyagi for holidays, might as well drop by Seijoh before I go back to Argentina." He said while Kenma shrugged. </p>
<p>"My assistant said I should take my break after the release in my game so I might just stay a little bit longer if a certain someone does not annoy me." Kenma said and glared at Kuroo who sat across him. Waves of laughter were heard from their table while Kuroo sulked. </p>
<p>He looked at his friends and smiled as he saw how happy his two closest friends he made in his high school days. Bokuto and Akaashi looked like they didn't even go through a break-up two years ago. Though Kenma was still fixing his relationship with Kuroo, it kind of made him envious. </p>
<p>He sometimes thinks about how would it feel to be with someone. Would it make him feel better? </p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Would you like some refill?" A voice asked beside and smiled as he saw a familiar face. "You're really a replica of your brother, you know?" He teased to which the gray-haired male groaned. "Oh shut yer mouth, we all know I'm the better twin," Osamu said. The statement earned laughter from the five males in the restaurant. </p>
<p>They are currently drinking at Osamu's main branch in Tokyo. But it's not like Osamu's restaurant is a bar, Bokuto just asked the gray-haired owner if they could drink there for privacy, after all, Bokuto, Kenma, and him are well-known. He didn't want to make a ruckus in a country he used to live in, now a foreign one to him. </p>
<p>"Where's Atsu-kun anyway?" He asked. "He said he'll stay in South Korea for this break. I thought Bokuto would be with him though." Osamu said. "I don't want to be a third-wheel! And I think it was fated for me to go back here and meet Keiji again." Bokuto said with a smile on his face. It earned some gagged face from Kenma and Kuroo while a blushed face from Akaashi. </p>
<p>He frowned at the third wheel part but nodded nonetheless.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The night continued with them drinking with the owner and shared some fun memories back in high school, that's what connects them anyways. </p>
<p>But it still pained him, to remember things in high school and to remember the broken promises he made with his best friend. </p>
<p>He suddenly felt wasted with regrets that night. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>---</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He didn't know how he got back to his hotel room after their little gathering earlier but he groaned as he woke up in the middle of the night with a massive headache. </p>
<p>He should really stop drinking too much, he could already hear his captain scolding him if he knew. </p>
<p>He stood up wobbly to grab the water bottle by the mini ref and took a quick shower to freshen up.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>As he went out of the bathroom, he clothed himself with some random shirt he took from his baggage and some sweatpants. He chuckled as he noticed it was an old shirt from his high school years, with some imprinted aliens all over. Of how it fit him, he didn't know but wearing it felt nice.</p>
<p>He checked his phone for some missed notifications and frowned as he saw it was only 2:30 AM in the morning. Usually, he would go back to sleep but after the quick shower and his uncured insomnia lately, he can't force himself to do so.</p>
<p>He checked his messages and sent a thank you message to Akaashi and Bokuto who messaged him that they took him to his hotel room after getting wasted earlier. He smiled as he closed his messaging app, knowing the two are asleep already, cuddling on their bed or somewhat.</p>
<p>"Gosh, I sound too bitter when I think about it. At least Kei-chan's happy now." He muttered to himself as he slumped down on his couch and went to his other social media accounts.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He smiled as he saw the tagged photos from earlier, courtesy of Bokuto who went back to posting again on social media after getting back together with Akaashi.</p>
<p><em>'I guess old habits die hard. I mean, if I were Bo-chan I would really show-off Kei-chan to the world.'</em>  He thought as he looked through Bokuto's social media. It was just full of Akaashi Keiji, volleyball, and Akaashi Keiji again.</p>
<p>He rolled his eyes as he looked at Kenma's social media. He smiled as he saw it was still full of games, streams, but the latest post caught him off-guard. Even if it was just a picture of the drink they were drinking earlier, Kuroo was in the background with a carefree smile. The picture made him smile.</p>
<p>He was actually happy to see Kenma again, especially when the younger male promised not to step his foot again in Japan.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After all, promises are meant to be broken.</p>
<p>He suddenly wanted to vomit, not of what he drank earlier but the bittersweet taste of regrets five years ago.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>---</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After scrolling for an hour or so, he still didn't feel sleepy nor tired even after being drunk earlier. He decided to linger by his room's balcony before grabbing a random sweater he had in his luggage.</p>
<p>He already packed his things yesterday since he decided to go to Osaka with Makki who insisted him to go back to Miyagi next week.</p>
<p>He didn't really plan to stay longer in Japan this year but he wanted to feel the Japanese lifestyle once more after changing his citizenship permanently to Argentinean.</p>
<p>It somehow felt foreign, to be back in his home country. He couldn't even remember the landmarks he used to go to on his summer trips with his family and friends. But it still felt home in some ways.</p>
<p>A suffocating home, if he was being honest.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>As he went out of the balcony, he was about to wear the sweater he took until he stopped when he felt the fabric.</p>
<p>A fabric that was foreign yet very familiar.</p>
<p>He gulped as he saw the white sweater in his hands.</p>
<p>With all the sweaters he owned, why would he grab this certain white sweater that clearly wasn't his?</p>
<p>After some contemplation and feeling the world being cruel to him, he wore the white sweater and smelled that familiar manly scent he thought he forgot years ago.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The scent hit him hard like how the memories came crashing like waves. </p>
<p>His younger self in Miyagi, his favorite bakery which sells milk bread, his friends and teammates.</p>
<p>And his best friend, Iwaizumi Hajime.</p>
<p>They all played like a film inside his head and he shook his head. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Stop reminiscing, Tooru. You're too old for that bullshit." He told himself as he resigned by leaning on the railings. He needed to distract himself. </p>
<p>He was about to grab his box of cigarettes from his pocket until he stopped, remembering that he should stop smoking due to health conditions his coach has mentioned before his break. He didn't even know when or why he started smoking but it calmed him down back then. </p>
<p><em>'No, Tooru. Nothing good will come from smoking. Do not break this promise to yourself.' </em>He thought as he started rubbing his hands together. He really needs a distraction. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He grabbed his phone hastily and looked for some distraction, he couldn't be left with his own thoughts as he could not trust himself. </p>
<p>He remembered his doctor's recommendation like distracting himself with sweets or music whenever he's in distress. With no choice left, he picked the latter one since he ran out of sweets.  </p>
<p>He started to shuffle his playlist and slowly, it eased him. He stayed by the railings despite the cold temperature and snow. He sure missed the cold weather in Japan which is colder in Argentina or maybe he missed the way he plays in the snow when he was younger. Either way, it's nostalgic. </p>
<p>Everything in Japan is nostalgic and he doesn't even know why he came back after all these years. </p>
<p>Maybe to fulfill his promise he wanted to break so badly?</p>
<p>Or break the promise he once broke years ago?</p>
<p>He had broken many promises already to the point he wasn't sure already. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He wasn't sure himself and he couldn't trust himself with his own thoughts so he tried to dive into his playlist instead.</p>
<p>He kept on humming within the beat as he cleared his mind while feeling the cold air on his face. 'Calm down, Tooru. You were better than this.'</p>
<p>But it was a wrong move for him as a certain song rooted him from his position.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>"I still remember third of December<br/>
Me in your sweater, you said it looked better<br/>
On me, than it did you,"</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>It took him a second or two to realize how coincidental the song is. He let out a small laugh. </p>
<p>It was already the 3rd of December, technically, and he's wearing a white sweater the owner once complimented him in.</p>
<p>He smiled as he remembered those days when it was a habit for him to "steal" his best friend's sweaters. Not that he doesn't have any, Iwaizumi's sweaters were just bigger which was comfortable for him. And he used to enjoy Iwaizumi's scent that smells like an ocean breeze but put a manly ooze in it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>"only if you knew<br/>
how much I liked you," </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>Ah, if only Iwa-chan knew the truth. The truth he kept for almost half of his life. </p>
<p>This was one of the promises he broke to Iwaizumi — he kept a secret from his best friend which was against one of their "rules" they made when they were kids.</p>
<p>He liked his best friend since then. It may be obvious to other people but Iwaizumi happened to be oblivious about it, fortunately. Because he wasn't sure what would happen with their friendship if the truth slips out. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>"but I watch your eyes<br/>
As she walks by<br/>
</em>
  </b>
  <b>
    <em>What a sight for sore eyes<br/>
</em>
  </b>
  <b>
    <em>Brighter than the blue<br/>
</em>
  </b>
  <b>
    <em>She's got you mesmerized<br/>
</em>
  </b>
  <b>
    <em>While I die"</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>He smiled bitterly as he remembered that day. Years may have passed but it was too vivid in his mind how that certain brown-haired girl captured Iwaizumi's eyes in the last year of their high school after their spring break.</p>
<p>It was the first time he saw Iwaizumi distracted about something, or rather someone. Or maybe he just didn't notice earlier since they were busy in volleyball at that time. </p>
<p>He remembered how Iwaizumi would always look somewhere at lunchtime whenever they will eat together. He didn't mind at first, but as he saw that brown-haired girl walks across their table before greeting them, he watched Iwaizumi's eyes follow the girl with a slight blush on his face. </p>
<p>He knew that day he would never have a chance with Iwa-chan as he felt something inside him dies slowly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>"Why would you ever kiss me? <br/>
I'm not even half as pretty"</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>He would not deny the brown-haired girl was pretty. Iwaizumi introduced her to them as his lab partner one day during lunchtime. He learned her name was Harumi, a spring beauty indeed. He also learned that she was in Iwaizumi's class and is the current class president. </p>
<p>He tried to look for some bad sides on the girl but unfortunately, he can't. Her voice was kind, just like her attitude and she was so polite to him. </p>
<p>Everything with her is pretty, from head to toe, inside and out. How could he even compete with that beauty? </p>
<p>No wonder she caught Iwa-chan's' attention without any effort. He knew it won't be long 'til his heart completely shatter in pieces. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>"Watch as she stands with her holding your hand<br/>
Put your arm 'round her shoulder, now I'm getting colder" </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>He already expected it when Iwaizumi told him he's planning to ask Harumi out for their prom. He didn't know what to say, at first, but all he could say was to tease the other male and pushing him to do so. </p>
<p>"I never thought you would be this sappy, Iwa-chan~" He remembered saying those words, before earning a punch from Iwaizumi on his arm. </p>
<p>It wasn't long when Iwaizumi told him that Harumi said the sweetest "yes". </p>
<p>He didn't know how to react but he still cheered for Iwaizumi while teasing him. He clearly avoided Makki's concerned eyes back then while spouting nonsense of "young love" to Iwaizumi. </p>
<p>No one knows how bitter his mouth felt like that night with his puffy eyes and clogged nose.   </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Prom night came faster than he wanted to and he decided to go stag, even if his initial plan was to go to prom with his best friend. </p>
<p>He still hoped that maybe Harumi ditched Iwaizumi at the last minute but as he saw them in the middle of the dance floor, Iwaizumi holding her hand with Harumi's arms snaked around his neck as they sway with the slow song playing, he continues to die inside, slowly and painfully. </p>
<p>He left earlier than everybody expected but everyone was too busy with their dates that night. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>"But how could I hate her? She's such an angel<br/>
But then again, kinda wished she were dead" </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>The last days of his high school passed in a blur, with him mostly spending it with Makki and Mattsun or the library during his free times. Iwaizumi was always spending his time with Harumi every lunchtime and he seldom sees Iwaizumi despite being neighbors. </p>
<p>He really wanted to hate Harumi for "stealing" his best friend from him. But how could hate a girl who makes the one he loves happy? His heart would not take it even if he wished Harumi out of the picture already. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>And just like that, they graduated with Iwaizumi entering his dream college with his girlfriend while he decided to move away to Argentina to pursue his dreams. </p>
<p>"Promise me you'll call me once you're settled there, okay?" Iwaizumi asked as he waited for his mother to prepare the car. He just nodded timidly. </p>
<p>"Promise me you'll update me monthly, okay?" He hummed in response. </p>
<p>"Promise me you'll call when something's troubling you, okay?" He hummed again. </p>
<p>"Yah, Shittykawa, you promised, okay?!" Iwaizumi asked again. "Hey Iwa-chan, are you my mom?" He asked teasingly and earned a smack on his head. "Hai! Hai! I promise Iwa-chan! You don't have to be so mean." He pouted. </p>
<p>"Hey 'Kawa." Iwaizumi called him after minutes of silence. He just hummed in response as he looked at the other male. "Promise me you'll take care of yourself there and visit us here if you can, okay?" </p>
<p>He remembered smiling genuinely for the last time. "I promise, Iwa-chan." </p>
<p>And those promises never hold their true meaning as they stayed unfulfilled and broken by him. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He didn't know when it started but tears continued flowing on his face as he reminisced those bitter memories. He never meant to break those promises but who could blame him? How could he fulfill a promise if he was deeply hurting inside? </p>
<p>How could he promise to call his best friend if it brings him pain every time he hears or sees the male's name? If every part of him reminded of Iwaizumi? </p>
<p>He crouched down on the floor as he hugged his knees to his chest. He really wanted to forget the man, but here he is, wearing that stupid white sweater that smelled like Iwaizumi. He thought he already forgot that manly scent from years ago. </p>
<p>He tried dating other girls and guys in Argentina, but no one knew him better as Iwaizumi did. No one could beat Iwaizumi; he knew there were better people but how could he find them if he still thinks Iwaizumi is the best? </p>
<p>He really felt pathetic. Really, how could a guy like him who has good looks could not get over his feelings towards his best friend who would never like him back as much as he did? </p>
<p>Iwaizumi would never like him back and he could never, not in this lifetime. Why? </p>
<p>He grabbed his phone and opened that certain e-mail he received weeks ago. </p>
<p>"<b>You are invited to celebrate </b><br/>
<b>the wedding of </b><br/>
<b>Iwaizumi Hajime and Suzuki Harumi<br/>
</b><br/>
<em>Saturday | January 16 20xx | 11 AM</em><br/>
<em>Mototerakoji Catholic Church</em><br/>
<br/>
RSVP<br/>
Name: Oikawa Tooru<br/>
<b>__ Accepts with Pleasure  <br/>
__  Decline with Regrets</b>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He felt more tears coming out of his eyes as he let out all of his pain he held inside him throughout these years. He never knew how good it felt to cry it all out. </p>
<p>He removed the white sweater he's wearing and hugged it tightly. He really missed Iwaizumi and he regrets not fulfilling his promises as his best friend. He promised to himself that this would be the last time he would ever cry over his feelings and try to really move on from his best friend. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>"Why would you ever kiss me? <br/>
</em>
  </b>
  <b>
    <em>I'm not even half as pretty<br/>
</em>
  </b>
  <b>
    <em>You gave her your sweater<br/>
</em>
  </b>
  <b>
    <em>It's just polyester<br/>
</em>
  </b>
  <b>
    <em>But you like her better<br/>
</em>
  </b>
  <b>
    <em>Wish I were"</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>He stood up with his shaky legs and held the white sweater in his right hand. He went to the end of the balcony as he let out a deep breath before releasing the white sweater that was made out of polyester in the air. </p>
<p>His life was too full of regrets already and this is the first step to stop regretting it. </p>
<p>Hopefully, this promise to himself wouldn't be broken this time. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>---</p>
<p> </p>
<p>ɴᴏᴡ ᴘʟᴀʏɪɴɢ ꜰʀᴏᴍ ᴘʟᴀʏʟɪꜱᴛ<br/>
♫ 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐧𝐢𝐚𝐜 ♫</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>𝙃𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧<br/>
Conan Gray</p>
<p>◄◄ ❚❚ ►►</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>originally posted in Wattpad: https://my.w.tt/xx6jAEgMVab<br/>book title: "as insomnia hits... | haikyuu!! pairings"<br/>author: AoKasei</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>